Loving Kindness – An Alternative Version
The writings of Thich Nhat Hanh offer a different version of Loving Kindness Meditation or Metta (Pali). This version may be influenced by Buddhaghosa in Visuddhimagga (or The Path to Purification, fifth century system of The Buddha’s teachings). The 
reality of no-self, or a static, permanent and inherent self is a core teaching of Buddhism; however, humans do experience life in Samsara via their perceived self – the experiencer of events and circumstances. Sensory awareness and mental formation make our realities. It is important to know yourself well, thus it is important to go deeper and deeper into the sources of your self-experiences. Negative emotions and feelings cause great suffering; fears and internal turmoil prevent happiness. To move beyond suffering, we need to understand and experience self-compassion and self-love. Our best hope may be the regular practice of Loving Kindness Meditation, especially if we are able to feel (interoception) the words as they transform inner body feelings and mind-thoughts. Here is a version of loving kindness. Try it. I have made several of my own adjustments in wording.
May I be free from suffering, aversion, and emotional conflict.
May I be mindful of peace and affection.
May I experience the inner light of my soul and feel safe.
May I learn from the loving spirit of myself.
May I be free from all afflictions, including greed, craving, fear, anger, and negative moods.
May I practice freeing myself from the skandhas of form (body), feelings, perception, mental formations, and consciousness.
May I learn to be at peace in impermanence when such things arise.
May I liberate myself from the suffering of my own “second arrows.”
May I allow myself the inner joy of silence.
May I accept and love myself.
May I be happy.
For more information refer to Thich Nhat Hanh (2014). No Mud, No Lotus: The Art of Transforming Suffering. Parallax Press.
Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC
From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha
Author of Mindful Happiness
suggested that addictive pain medications and surgery should be the last options for most people. I have modified and integrated body scan instructions presented by Jon Kabat-Zinn and Thich Nhat Hanh. I have also added my own body scan style and process. Kabat-Zinn noted that body scan meditations may be the most effective mindfulness meditation practice for management of physical pain. I would add that it may also help with psychological or emotional pain as well. For best results practice the body scan for 45 minutes every day. Strong practice brings better outcomes. Here are the instructions.
the neck. Notice.
rest fully. Rest in Yoga Nidra if you know how to do so. Simply be with your body and breath.
that when we die the essence but not the ego lives on into new experiences. Karma and re-birth are givens in this spiritual view. Our tissue and bones, all our atoms and molecules of body-mind decompose. Eventually we return to the earth as elements, carbon dioxide, and water. The mind is purely a biologically (bio-chemical) function of existence, of being in this world. It cannot be permanent, so neither can we. The mind is a n integration and response to experiences coming into us from our sense-doors. And the ego, well that goes away along with the rest of us. The confusion that sometimes exists about being alive in this contemporary world versus living on an another or other form/s is challenging to many people. The Buddha did not deny that we exist in this samsaric world; he placed greater emphasis, however, on our spiritual, moral, and ethical development. On his death-bed he reportedly noted to his followers that everything is transient, so personal attachment to anything (people, places, things, experiences) is not recommended. This is not nihilism, nor is it some form of adverse nothingness. He called to his followers to know their own true self, and to follow the dharma in all life’s experiences. If all things are impermanent, then so is our pain and suffering. And yes, so is our joy and happiness. When unhelpful thoughts and emotions dominate, take refuge in The Buddha, The Dharma, and The Sangha. So what does this imply in day-to-day challenges of living? Below I have noted a few Zen Buddhist practices that may be helpful to you – Buddhist or not.
meditations below are presented to expand the use of interoceptive processes in therapy practice. They are presented in very brief form, so slow down the work when using these in your therapy practice. Rather than repeating the introductory process, I will note it here. Be sure to use it in each meditation.
cognition, emotion, behavior and sensory contact with all phenomena are fully engaged in evaluation of everything: did I get what I wanted and avoid suffering for now or not? This is the hedonic treadmill of lived attachment and avoidance. Cognitive-Behavioral analytics ends up in the same place over and over again: short-term pleasure (getting what I want for now) and longer-term suffering (fear of losing it or being involved in more emotional pain). This state of constant seeking (how many “likes” do I have?) tricks us into thinking that this time, it will work. We seek safety, security, and various forms of wealth; we expect to achieve these goals and to avoid as much suffering as possible. This is impossible, since the seeking and attaching itself eventually causes more personal suffering. We humans have very short memories when it comes to the realities of pleasure and pain, happiness and suffering. Our emotional striving to be perfect and get ahead often leave us with just more desire. The sad fact is that no matter how successful we are in accumulating all the goodies, we tend to continue our suffering sometimes in different forms.
self. It does not change even when the content of experience does change. Become your observing self in a state of pure awareness without judging or evaluating. In the evolutionary process, clinging is one of the most primal actions. The “vapor of thoughts” along with strong attachment clinging causes our norms to be related to our false self – with its entitlement, feeling special as a defense, greed, anger, even hatred. Just STOP all of this process as much as you can; focus on who/what you are at the deepest most spiritual levels. Who am I is the eternal and most important question. As you meditate and do yoga, concentrate on radically accepting everything that has happened to you and may still be happening to you. This does not mean stand by and allow yourself to be abused by cruel people; however, it does mean to pay very acute attention to what experiences trigger your ego-defenses and negative reactions in thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. How much control over your emotions are you willing to give up to other people? Radically accept as a norm, do your asanas, meditate often, allow your true self to “let go” of the false self”s ego and superego demands. Pursue spiritual practices, be compassionate and generous, and live the life your true self desires for you. This is a life of more inner peace, even tranquility, more happiness, less competition, more love, and DOING good for others. This path is difficult in our materialistic world. The fruits of your efforts will be gratifying! If you practice, you will discover the truth about being a happier, more lovable person.
and there is nothing you can do about it; this is pure suffering, and it is painful. However what you decide to have your mind, body and emotions do with the first arrow of suffering is called the second arrow. This very sharply pointed arrow can lead to long-term, even life-long suffering about something you failed to radically accept and let go. Become an expert in perceiving the initial activity of your second arrows, and STOP as soon as possible. At this point you may apply RAIN – recognize what if happening; accept it; investigate causation; and, apply no-self or if less skilled “its not about me attitudes.” These follow-up practices should be very helpful to you in your effort to become a more calm and more happy person.