Activities Archives - Mindful Happiness

November 26, 2020 By Admin

Personal Happiness in the Age of COVID-19

We are all in this together! However, wealth and employment status do play important roles. RTI International and the Consortium for Implementation Science have serious concerns about the links between racial equity, social justice, and personal responses to COVID-19. Neuroscience notes that personal happiness in a brain-mind-body thing. Its formula is hard-wired in our brain. In difficult times, it is even more important to figure out your personal formula (without self-medication) to satisfactory levels of joy and happiness. Because happiness is physical, psychological, emotional, and spiritual (in ways) we need to focus more now on experiencing it. We cannot be happy if we focus more on fear, anxiety, and depression; we need to make happiness a personal priority. According to a poll by the American Psychiatric Association, over one-third of Americans noted that the pandemic has impacted their mental health in negative ways. According to the American Psychological Association, two-thirds of adults experience better well-being in post-traumatic growth. Here are some things you can do to improve/expand your personal happiness in these times.

Do your best to find positive and helpful interpretations of your experience.
Maintaining a hopeful attitude is important.
Hold on to empathy for yourself and for others.
Spend some time relaxing with your favorite music.
Watch lots of comedy.
Happiness is an inside job, so end the blame game. This is not to say unfairness does not exist.
Do your best to eat well, sleep well, exercise and use proven stress coping skills daily.
Connect with other you care about – and who care about you.
Move your body!
Practice proven breathing techniques that calm us – and or excite us.
Follow Thich Nhat Hanh’s advice and savor anything you can – do not rush it.
Keep in mind that Buddhism implies impermanence is primary – nothing stays the same over time.
Get qualified/licensed professional help when you need it – do not delay.

Since the list of courses for this information is plentiful, I will not list them. Google the topic if you wish.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

January 12, 2020 By Admin

Two Forms of Self-Help Journaling

Self-Help Journaling – Two Methods

Generally there are two forms of self-help journaling: writing about worries and concerns OR writing about joy and happiness. In my more than 35 years of clinical experience I have not found the former to be very helpful. Most people stuck in negative mood states are not easily able to disengage themselves from negative, worrisome thoughts. For these folks journaling and placing more cognitive and emotional attention on negatives is often unhelpful. So I stopped recommending this form of journaling to clients years ago. If you suffer from anxiety, depression, trauma, addictions and/or eating problems, I would not recommend negative problem solving journaling as a practice. Our limbic brain sets us up for overdrive when dealing with negative emotions and experiences, so no need to add more cognition and attention to it all. Better to work on positives!

I have found positive journaling to be amazingly helpful for some people. The practice is quite easy. Simply find a journal you like to look at and hold. Yes, visual and kinesthetic pleasures are important as motivators. Place it near your bed, and every night a few minutes before you go to bed do some journaling – even a few minutes can be helpful. Just write freely, without censoring in any way. It is a good idea to use all your sensory experiences here. What did you see, hear, feel, smell, taste, experience that you may wish to write about? Once you get into the process, try to go a bit deeper: exactly what was it about the positive experience that impacted you, and how deeply? Do your best not to seek ideal happiness experiences (there may not be nirvana); these realities are far and few for most people. So best to begin with simply paying more attention to positives during the day. You may begin to notice that some of the experiences and things you have been conditioned to take for granted are actually positive in nature. Pick only one experience to write about. Later go back often and re-read what you wrote.

For more information refer to J. Smiechowski’s ideas in Easy Health Options Home; MedicalXpress; Journal of Psychophysiology; and University of Rochester, Journaling for Mental Health.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

December 24, 2019 By Admin

Journaling and Grief Process

Regular brief journaling may be helpful in your grief and horror regarding significant personal losses of self and/or others. Here are the various ways it may be helpful to you.

Writing and reading about your personal loss experience may help you to make sense of the process, and at the same time guide you gently on that path.
Journaling may open up past and present realities – both positive and negative – about your loss experience.
At times anger, resentments, and regrets will come up. These realities open you up to the depth of the grief experience. Do not linger too long there!
S. Kierkegard reminded us that our lived experiences are processed forwardly, but better understood if observed backwards. Journaling helps to focus us on the present but never lets go fully of the past.
It may be important to you to make your personal journal more balanced with both negative and positive experiences. For example, it may be helpful to list all simple pleasures you experienced in any given day. It may also be a good idea not to linger emotionally too long when such experiences trigger negative states.
I have always found it helpful to list my personal gratitudes, even in the midst of painful loss and suffering. It is not uncommon for the most valued experiences to be linked with the lost love-object and your shared life.
If fear and trepidation occur as you move through the grief process, I suggest that you break down the scary moments into smaller, more manageable periods of time, space, and emotions.
Pay attention to and write about both helpful and unhelpful thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and sensations related to your grief process. Be aware keenly of small improvements in all.
You may notice that as you slowly heal you spend less time journaling. This is natural.
You may wish to do “grave worship” practices, or simply write many good things about the lost person.
V. Frankl noted that when we cannot change the reality of a situation, we may have to change ourself.
When you find yourself crying over your loss, that is a very good time to contemplate and do journaling.
Reading related poetry or writing your own may help you.
If and when you experience the emptiness of the void inside, do your best to find words for the experience. And, work to fill that void by re-engaging with your life as it is now.
It is always a good idea to develop and practice personal rituals about your healing. Write about this in your journal.
S. Becket reminded us that we must go on! As painful as it may be, we cannot stop the process.
As P. Chodron noted, we must allow it all to fall apart before we can find the resilience to face what comes next. In most situations, what comes next is slow improvement in your emotional condition.
Rest in peace with your breath, and do more meditation or yoga if that suits you well.
You may wish to visit optionb.org or other sites that support grief work.

Refer to Sandberg, S. and Grant, A. (2017). Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy. New York: A. A. Knopf, pp. 58-76.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

October 18, 2019 By Admin

Spirit Wars and “Spiritual Warfare”

This post will discuss the topic and personal strategies. Most content will relate to both physical realities and metaphorical meanings and categories. Since a person viewing their self as fighting a spiritual war most likely holds onto certain parts of self in this endeavor, it is highly unlikely that the actual adversaries are authentic entities outside/inside the self. It is more likely that personal experience has conditioned the person to understand these variable processes as quite serious and sometimes dangerous. To maintain a clear boundary, this post is not presenting a way to treat people suffering from any form of identity disorder; rather, this post offer some ideas about how one might go about becoming healthier via less targeted clinical interventions. The remaining part of the post will offer comments and suggestions for personal consideration of the reader. Most content deals with realistic natural phenomena in life. I hope I am making myself clear here. I hope you find the content helpful.

Since pure white/golden healing light has been noted in almost all major spiritual traditions, you might wish to experiment with the experiences noted below. Do your best to see the light as a potential healing ally. Allow yourself to feel the light. Do not block!
Experiment with observing the rising and setting sun. Allow the light to penetrate you; use kinesthetic awareness to do so. Do your best to feel the light and experience its healing power. Enjoy this! Do not look directly into the intense light energy of the sun.
Study basic astrophysics to learn how gravity (one of the main constants in the universe) has direct effects on dark/black energies.
On a clear night, look deeply into the starlit sky and allow the star energies to enter you. Feel it; use it. Enjoy this!
On a clear day, look into the blue sky with moving clouds. Allow the light to penetrate you and feel its power. Enjoy this!
Go for a silent walk in nature. Notice! Use all your senses to encounter all that is there. Gently gaze at a mountain, pond, lake, or stream. Notice the transparency off the clear water as it moves downstream. Send your troubles (like a leaf) downstream with the current. Make the best of your attention and intention here. Notice! Relax! Enjoy this!
You may wish to try the Ten Directions experiment. Discern carefully what directions are helpful. What directions bring you into your deep inner self ally? Stand silently and notice the healing air/wind coming from the North, South, East, and West. Notice the effects! Now stand there and bring your attention to everything inside of you. And next – to everything outside of you. Look up and look down; notice. Now use your natural ability to project and send your troubles far, far, far away. Notice! Now move your body slowly and notice; now move your body with more vigorous energy, and notice. You have completed your Ten Directions experiment. Hope it was helpful. Thank our indigenous First Nation Peoples and Buddhist concepts for this process.
Relax and begin to breathe deeply, slowly. Notice the ease and the difficulty. Continue to breathe. Allow the deeper, slower breath to calm you. Notice how the freshness of the committed breath restores your airflow in your throat, heart, soul, etc. Allow the clean flow of healing breath to cleanse you- in your throat, heart, soul.
Now do your best to engage your helpful beliefs and helpful behaviors to support your internal healing. Engage in activities/behaviors that you find helpful. Do not engage in thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that are unhelpful. Be strong.
Examine your personal space-time continuum, and pay close attention to when your time and space are safe for you. Spend much more time in this aspect of time and space. Do the same for being happier.
Practice paying more attention to the silent, still space between your breaths, between your thoughts, between your heartbeats, and between your periods of suffering. Use the energy of your attention to enhance the space, silence, peace, and tranquility.
Use your personal, natural wisdom to disempower any obstacles that hinder your progress to improved health and happiness.
Use all of the above as metaphors of self-protection against all sources of suffering.
Know that emotional dysregulation, anger, fear all feed your inner dragons. Best to starve them!
Lastly, if you are a religious person, pray more.
If you read spiritual books, you may want to try the Lectio Divina approach. In this Latin Christian Church method one reads a spiritual passage over and over and over again, each time going more deeply into the self and core religious beliefs. This form of meditation tends to enhance the power of the spiritual information being read as well as the power of the belief.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

May 31, 2019 By Admin

More on Yoga Nidra

Yoga nidra is sometimes called yoga sleep or yoga relaxation. It is a very powerful mindfulness technique that allows one to relax the body and limbic brain area, while holding mental control for deeper relaxation and projective practices without falling asleep. For some it may be like lucid dreaming, but a state that remains focused on the physical, energetic, and psychic body. In mindfulness terms, this is a state of deep relaxed awareness. Advanced practices use projective techniques outside the body. One asset of this practice is that it allows us to retain cognitive awareness as the body and brain waves shift into more subtle states. Once we are in the subtle energy field, the body-mind may be altered with relative ease. The ancient practice helps practitioners to improve physical conditions, injuries, energy homeostasis, and to awaken dormant energies.

Ideally this practice is done in a laying down position, so the body can conserve energy. Laying on your back is called savasana, the course pose – being very still like a corpse. The use of blankets and cushions may improve comfort. It may also be done in a comfortable sitting position. During practice it is important not to move the body in any way; this is a goal even if uncomfortable sensations arise. Our job is to observe the movement of inner energies without physical or mental reactions, thus allowing a more expansive meditation experience.

Stages of Yoga Nidra

In the first stage of practice, we engage in a progressive body scan to relax and harmonize the physical body. This allows gross or non-subtle energy to move out of the body so the physical body is completely relaxed. We may feel the tension leaving our mind and body. This alone may enable one to experience waves of deep relaxation and peace of mind. However, this first stage is simply preparation for other yoga nidra techniques. If practice time is extended, sometimes people experience a drop in body temperature.

In the second stage, the practitioner will be guided into other subtle energy experiences. These may include sensory awareness and manipulation, chakra awareness, visualizations, awakening energy techniques, and projective experiences. In the more advanced yoga nidra techniques, it is important that the teacher possesses ample experience in doing these practices. A good reason for this is that while being in deeper energetic systems of the body, a person’s stored tensions, memories, and perhaps karma may be released. Participant safety is a priority, so the teacher must observe closely to notice signs the practice is going beyond the practitioner’s capacity.

Yoga nidra is a powerful body-based technique that may improve access to subtle energy as well as cognitive and physical functioning. It can be a very powerful, healing meditation.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC & Brian Tobin

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness