Loving Kindness Archives - Mindful Happiness

June 21, 2019 By Admin

Loving Kindness – An Alternative Version

The writings of Thich Nhat Hanh offer a different version of Loving Kindness Meditation or Metta (Pali). This version may be influenced by Buddhaghosa in Visuddhimagga (or The Path to Purification, fifth century system of The Buddha’s teachings). The reality of no-self, or a static, permanent and inherent self is a core teaching of Buddhism; however, humans do experience life in Samsara via their perceived self – the experiencer of events and circumstances. Sensory awareness and mental formation make our realities. It is important to know yourself well, thus it is important to go deeper and deeper into the sources of your self-experiences. Negative emotions and feelings cause great suffering; fears and internal turmoil prevent happiness. To move beyond suffering, we need to understand and experience self-compassion and self-love. Our best hope may be the regular practice of Loving Kindness Meditation, especially if we are able to feel (interoception) the words as they transform inner body feelings and mind-thoughts. Here is a version of loving kindness. Try it. I have made several of my own adjustments in wording.

May I be free from suffering, aversion, and emotional conflict.

May I be mindful of peace and affection.

May I experience the inner light of my soul and feel safe.

May I learn from the loving spirit of myself.

May I be free from all afflictions, including greed, craving, fear, anger, and negative moods.

May I practice freeing myself from the skandhas of form (body), feelings, perception, mental formations, and consciousness.

May I learn to be at peace in impermanence when such things arise.

May I liberate myself from the suffering of my own “second arrows.”

May I allow myself the inner joy of silence.

May I accept and love myself.

May I be happy.

For more information refer to Thich Nhat Hanh (2014). No Mud, No Lotus: The Art of Transforming Suffering. Parallax Press.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

August 1, 2017 By Admin

Loving Kindness Meditation from The Buddha

Loving Kindness Meditation (hereafter LKM) is, perhaps, one of the most popular meditation practices in the world. What many practitioners do not know is that one form of it came directly from The Buddha. Along with LKM wisdom we also are guided by the enlightened words of The Dalai Lama and Thubten Chodron. In their Approaching the Buddhist Path: The Library of Wisdom and Compassion, Vol. 1, they emphasize how we humans are highly emotional by nature. As we experience pleasure, neutrality, or pain we also respond via emotional evaluations, thoughts, and actions. Our basis for emotional experience can either be constructive (caring, kind, and loving) or afflictive (greed, aversion, and anger), and can lead to long-term happiness or misery. What differentiates Buddhist Psychology from Western Psychology (say CBT for example), is that Buddhism maintains a focus on longer-term changes, changes than can transform into true joy and happiness or become habitual suffering and pain. Impermanence does not end. One may become a joyous person living a wholesome life, to one may become hopelessly trapped in samaric misery. By living a life of caring, generosity, compassion, and non-harming humans can attain deeper, true happiness in the long run. One way to achieve such a result is by practicing/living according to LKM and compassion for others. Beyond meditation alone, however, is the trie land of walking the walk, practicing the practice in your personal life.

In the Metta Sutra (Karaniyametta Sutra of Theravada Buddhism) as noted by The Buddha in The Suttanipata presents as a potentially protective sutra; by following these principles and practices, one lives by wholesome values, virtue, gentleness, inner peace, humility, conscious self-control, and kindness. Thus not only the person practicing but all who encounter that person live within a deeper protective and tranquil experience. Below I will note certain statements noted by The Buddha. As you practice this form of LKM, ask yourself if you are living the true path of his message.

May all beings be happy and secure; May they be inwardly happy…

[May] no one…deceive another…[May] no one…wish suffering for another…

[May] one…develop loving-kindness – a state of mind without boundaries – …toward the whole world…

Whether standing, walking, sitting, or lying…one…resolve[s] on this mindfulness: they call this a divine dwelling here…

Possessing good behavior, endowed with vision, having removed greed for sensual pleasures,

One never again comes back to…[these]…

If you do not find these statements to be fulfilling, you can always go back to: May I and all beings be safe, healthy, free from suffering, happy and living wth ease.

For more information refer to The Dalai Lama and Thubten Chodron (2017). Approaching the Buddhist Path: The Library of Wisdom and Compassion, Vol. 1. Boston, MA: Wisdom Publications. See also Bhikkhu Bodhi (2017). Loving Kindness. Boston, MA: Wisdom Publications.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Mindfulness, Movement, and Meditation Practices Meditation Master Thich Nhat Hanh offers some of the most helpful mindfulness, movement, and meditation instructions available today. His themes here are about reducing your suffering, increasing your satisfactions, and expanding your happiness as a result. Please do not note that “I do not have time to do these things!” […]

Psychoanalytic Psychotherapy “gems” In my opinion there are about eleven such “gems” in psychoanalytic psychotherapy. Use of these interventions in various types of psychotherapy may improve clinical outcomes beyond insight. Although these curative interventions have often been associated with treatment of psychological trauma, object loss, and inner conflict, they may also be useful in the […]

Happiness Characteristics – Post #2 Below I will note a few key characteristics of experiences and attitudes associated with happiness. Do your best to experience some of these each day – as much as is possible. Here is the first list. Being Fully Alive to Experiences – Do your best to be fully involved in […]

More RESPECT Needed for People Being Served Recently, I read a post by William White, the well-known Recovery advocate. The post dealt with the troublesome area of language used to describe, refer to people suffering from various conditions – addictions being only one. While some may respond to his post by thinking it is simply […]

What is Mindfulness – The Nature of Mindfulness This is an expanded second post on the nature of mindfulness. This post will begin with secular understandings, and end with basic spiritual path information. Generally mindfulness is a wide-ranging process with a special noticing quality. It focuses the power of attention leading to improved concentration. Mindfulness […]

Core Elements in Clinical Supervision In addition to what supervisors bring into group supervision and clinical training, the list below will be used for discussion about YOUR supervisory role. The order of content below is generally random. The content noted applies to clinical supervision; it could also apply to doing effective therapy. The skills and […]

Equanimity, Suffering, and Resilience It is said that equanimity (Pali – upekkha), the seventh factor of enlightenment and the tenth perfection, is an end-product of life-long personal practice in meditation and/or meditative yoga. It is about “walking the walk.” Some practitioners note that equanimity is the foundation for other helpful states of mind and body. […]

Tantric Meditation on Emptiness of Self Mind training on emptiness of self requires single-pointed attention and concentration on space, empty space. Emptiness awareness in equipoise of meditation appears as the empty of space. When we practice this repeatedly with calm abiding we can attain direct experience of non-conceptual realization – true emptiness. Awareness of emptiness […]

Common Barriers to Meditation Practice Dan Harris, an ABC news anchor, has just published a book on Meditation for Fidgety Skeptics. In his book Harris notes several common barriers to regular meditation practice, and what to do about them. Since I have been meditating since the early 1980’s I have added additional suggestions. Here are the barriers […]

Mind Training Over Our Impulses Mindful awareness of our impulses is a very important pathway to improved emotion regulation and, perhaps, more happiness in life. It can be unusually helpful to people suffering from anxiety, depression, and substance misuse. Vedana refers to the feeling tone in our body. It is one of the foundations of mindfulness […]

Mindful Happiness – Mountain Metaphor The mountain journey metaphor has often been used for mindfulness practice (J. Kabat-Zinn) and spiritual experience of inner clearing and healing (L. V. Andrews). Here I will paraphrase and modify both of these approaches into brief versions for your practice. Practice this and find your center of true inner happiness […]

Mindfulness Can Activate More Grace in Our Lives Today we all need to be cultivating more and deeper grace. Grace needs to be activated. Given so many of our cultural problems (murders and mass murders by gunfire, rampant personal and corporate greed, ego-entitlement, chronic stress, feelings of insecurity, technological advances that do not ADVANCE us, […]

How Suicide impacts Psychotherapists One of the greatest fears of psychotherapists is that one of their clients will commit suicide. Here are some common reactions of psychotherapists when one of their clients commits suicide. In some ways these reactions are sequential, but no exact concrete sequence is well documented. Here is a list to consider. […]

Mindfulness Expands the Art of Journal Writing T. Merton, J. Kerouc, I. Progoff, J. Upton, and others have helped to expand the art or journal writing practice. This type of practice can become your mindfulness practice. You will need to write on a daily basis (even if briefly), and you will need to be highly […]

Mindfulness – Self-Kindness Practice Befriending the self is one of the most difficult things for Americans to do. It is probably true that self-kindness is difficult for most people; however, the current rampant criticism (I am right! You are wrong!) and extreme greed manifesting in the United States tends to produce two opposite extremes: […]

Crisis Resilience Skills – Mindful Happiness Below I will list various interventions that have proven effective in reducing the level of personal crisis. The sources for many of these skills came from Burns (1980), Ellis (1995), Seligman (1988), Linehan (1993, 2015)), Hayes (2018), and Thich Nhat Hanh (various publications). The skills noted are for immediate […]

Practicing Interoceptive Meditations Anthony R. Quintiliani, Ph.D., LADC The mindfulness-based process and intervention of interoception (also called neuroception) has slowly moved from meditation practice into clinical practice, now being part of the recommended MBSR, ACT, and more current CBT-based therapies. The three brief meditations below are presented to expand the use of interoceptive processes in […]

Human Beings Have Trouble BEING Human – Some Sound Advice from Dr Anthony Quintiliani The world today appears to be even more destructive than ever before in human history. However, historians and violence researchers inform us that we as average persons are safer today than we were in the past. Finger-tip access to world-wide media […]

How to Offer Personal Tribute to Those Who Have Died The Four Noble Truths tell us sobering news. There is suffering, and impermanence of all things including us and our loved ones. Below I have listed several thing you can do to HONOR a person you have lost. Here is the list. Recall a special […]

Treating Depression – A Mindful Approach The following approach does not represent a complete intervention sequence in clinical depression; however, the steps noted may be helpful if/when clinicians find their typical interventions are not working. The approach noted here assumes that formal assessment of depression has taken place (objective measure), and that the clinician has a way […]