Loving Kindness Archives - Mindful Happiness

June 21, 2019 By Admin

Loving Kindness – An Alternative Version

The writings of Thich Nhat Hanh offer a different version of Loving Kindness Meditation or Metta (Pali). This version may be influenced by Buddhaghosa in Visuddhimagga (or The Path to Purification, fifth century system of The Buddha’s teachings). The reality of no-self, or a static, permanent and inherent self is a core teaching of Buddhism; however, humans do experience life in Samsara via their perceived self – the experiencer of events and circumstances. Sensory awareness and mental formation make our realities. It is important to know yourself well, thus it is important to go deeper and deeper into the sources of your self-experiences. Negative emotions and feelings cause great suffering; fears and internal turmoil prevent happiness. To move beyond suffering, we need to understand and experience self-compassion and self-love. Our best hope may be the regular practice of Loving Kindness Meditation, especially if we are able to feel (interoception) the words as they transform inner body feelings and mind-thoughts. Here is a version of loving kindness. Try it. I have made several of my own adjustments in wording.

May I be free from suffering, aversion, and emotional conflict.

May I be mindful of peace and affection.

May I experience the inner light of my soul and feel safe.

May I learn from the loving spirit of myself.

May I be free from all afflictions, including greed, craving, fear, anger, and negative moods.

May I practice freeing myself from the skandhas of form (body), feelings, perception, mental formations, and consciousness.

May I learn to be at peace in impermanence when such things arise.

May I liberate myself from the suffering of my own “second arrows.”

May I allow myself the inner joy of silence.

May I accept and love myself.

May I be happy.

For more information refer to Thich Nhat Hanh (2014). No Mud, No Lotus: The Art of Transforming Suffering. Parallax Press.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

August 1, 2017 By Admin

Loving Kindness Meditation from The Buddha

Loving Kindness Meditation (hereafter LKM) is, perhaps, one of the most popular meditation practices in the world. What many practitioners do not know is that one form of it came directly from The Buddha. Along with LKM wisdom we also are guided by the enlightened words of The Dalai Lama and Thubten Chodron. In their Approaching the Buddhist Path: The Library of Wisdom and Compassion, Vol. 1, they emphasize how we humans are highly emotional by nature. As we experience pleasure, neutrality, or pain we also respond via emotional evaluations, thoughts, and actions. Our basis for emotional experience can either be constructive (caring, kind, and loving) or afflictive (greed, aversion, and anger), and can lead to long-term happiness or misery. What differentiates Buddhist Psychology from Western Psychology (say CBT for example), is that Buddhism maintains a focus on longer-term changes, changes than can transform into true joy and happiness or become habitual suffering and pain. Impermanence does not end. One may become a joyous person living a wholesome life, to one may become hopelessly trapped in samaric misery. By living a life of caring, generosity, compassion, and non-harming humans can attain deeper, true happiness in the long run. One way to achieve such a result is by practicing/living according to LKM and compassion for others. Beyond meditation alone, however, is the trie land of walking the walk, practicing the practice in your personal life.

In the Metta Sutra (Karaniyametta Sutra of Theravada Buddhism) as noted by The Buddha in The Suttanipata presents as a potentially protective sutra; by following these principles and practices, one lives by wholesome values, virtue, gentleness, inner peace, humility, conscious self-control, and kindness. Thus not only the person practicing but all who encounter that person live within a deeper protective and tranquil experience. Below I will note certain statements noted by The Buddha. As you practice this form of LKM, ask yourself if you are living the true path of his message.

May all beings be happy and secure; May they be inwardly happy…

[May] no one…deceive another…[May] no one…wish suffering for another…

[May] one…develop loving-kindness – a state of mind without boundaries – …toward the whole world…

Whether standing, walking, sitting, or lying…one…resolve[s] on this mindfulness: they call this a divine dwelling here…

Possessing good behavior, endowed with vision, having removed greed for sensual pleasures,

One never again comes back to…[these]…

If you do not find these statements to be fulfilling, you can always go back to: May I and all beings be safe, healthy, free from suffering, happy and living wth ease.

For more information refer to The Dalai Lama and Thubten Chodron (2017). Approaching the Buddhist Path: The Library of Wisdom and Compassion, Vol. 1. Boston, MA: Wisdom Publications. See also Bhikkhu Bodhi (2017). Loving Kindness. Boston, MA: Wisdom Publications.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Mindfulness On Loss, Grief and Mourning Mindfulness about personal loss, grief, and mourning may encompass many things. Here I will focus on the process and what people can do to better handle their suffering and pain. One way to look at it is through the lens of radical acceptance; another is via the reality of […]

Vipassana Meditation: Impermanence Although standard vipassana meditation practice leading to insight about the true nature of reality does not recommend what I am about to do, I plan to do it anyway. This meditation center is all about innovation in practice and generalization regarding the benefits of meditation for both regular meditators and novices. Below […]

Calming Your Self-Critical Self with Mindfulness A core problem for many people is their incessant self (or other) criticism. This is a major part of our psychological mind suffering today. In the past life for most people was more difficult, so human basic needs were the energized priorities; today so many of us have been […]

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Effective Clinical Supervision Perhaps other than the mental health status of the therapist and her/his ethical clinical skills, there is no more important variable in successful clinical work than effective CLINICAL supervision. I emphasize “clinical’ because in today’s bureaucratic systems, so much supervision tends to be about required procedures like utilization level, reporting requirements, and documentation for services […]

A major part of suffering comes with the inability to shift unhelpful, negative focus on troubling thoughts and feelings. This cognitive reality is common in all the major mental health problems people suffer from: anxiety, depression, trauma, substance abuse, and eating disorders. Due to the lack of “wise-mind” skills most people suffering from these […]

Practice Approaches to for Mindful and Enhanced Emotion Regulation Brought to us by way of The Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont Mindful Approaches for Enhanced Emotion Regulation; here are some approaches to practice. 1)In some ways you could understand the progression from auto-pilot mind to greater stability and equanimity of […]

What The Buddha Taught About Metta In the Metta Sutta (Anguttara Nikaya, 11:16) The Buddha said that we should seek the following characteristics in how we live our lives: Wholesome goodness; Gentle speech; Human Humility; Personal contentment; Personal calmness; and, Pure-heartedness in all we think, say, and do. By living this way we would be […]

Gurdjieff’s The Fourth Way Meditations: A way of Being and Knowing Although Gurdjieff developed a whole way of being and knowing, including attentional practices, dance/body movements, group processes, and meditations here I will focus only on some of the suggested meditations. In particular, I include the meditations noted by his primary student (J. DeSalzmann, 2011). […]

Self-Care as Ritual Self-care for Americans is often considered a luxury. Due to our technological demands and addictions (Demons as they are), and the slow slipping of our economic structures, we are often at the mercy of the bottom line at work. Over-paid CEOs and CFOs and their many assistants eat up so, so much […]

Expanded Information about Your Compassion Practices and Benefits Compassion Practice Tips and Exercises The Buddha noted that one should not dwell on the past, become too attached to future outcomes, but instead concentrate our mind only on the present moment of our experiences. The Dalai Lama noted that compassion is a necessary condition for inner […]

The True Nature of Phenomena Here I will present common steps in the process of vipassana meditation. My presentation will end with a brief discussion of nirvana (enlightenment). 1) It will be helpful not to have strong conceptual intention about your goal of attaining insight. You will know when you have entered it via your […]

The “I AM THAT” Meditation Elena Brower’s new book, Practice You: A Journal (Sounds True, 2017) has many thoughtful suggestions on how to connect with the true inner self, and – more importantly – how to improve your self-views and the experience of your deep inner self. Below I have modified her presentation of the “I Am […]

Advanced Meditations – Middle Way -Wisdom Path Between Extremes These meditation practices are advanced, and combine complex ideas from Nagarjuna (Indian Master), T’ong-Kha-Pa (Tibetan Master), and The 14th Dalai Lama (Tenzin Gyatso). In keeping with the mixed secular nature of my meditation center, I have decided to present these complex ideas with several of my […]

The Needs of Traumatized Children – Learning Activity As a means to hone in on your helping behaviors, complete this learning activity. NEEDS List a Concrete Example for Each Unmet Need. Biological _______________________________________________ Psychological ____________________________________________ Social __________________________________________________ Emotional _______________________________________________ Educational ______________________________________________ Spiritual ________________________________________________ Attachment ______________________________________________ What can YOU do to help meet […]

Using Creativity in Clinical Supervision Effective clinical supervision is a combination of hearable direction about clinical practice, gentle-direct leadership, clinical “Know-How,” evidence-based skills, complex psychodynamics, and the willingness to work with others on their developmental processes. There are risks involved. I have provided clinical supervision and consultation to other clinicians for 43 years without a […]

Personal Experiences When in Longer-Term Silence The luxury (or horror depending on your perspective and psychological structure) of being in long-term silence is a rare thing in today’s noisy, super-active and reactive world. The experience is difficult to describe verbally. The best we can do is count on our own experiences and the writings of […]

Mindful Movement as Part of Practice Mindful movement is an accepted part of regular practice. Such practices as walking meditation, more vigorous yoga asanas, qi gong, and tail chi are all part of this respected mindfulness tradition. Here I will introduce you to a very simple pre-meditation movement sequence. Hope you practice it very soon. […]

A Primary Source of Unhappiness Self-medication to reduce or avoid pain and suffering is a major unhelpful habit in the United States. It is a desperate human effort to reduce pain and suffering in physical and psychological experiences. Therefore, we humans may be hard-wired for it. When we suffer and do not utilize effective wise […]

Mediation: Conscious or Not? A true, in depth understanding about what human consciousness is and how it works has eluded mind and brain scientists for many years. A few very interesting ideas have been presented by Stuart Hameroff, professor emeritus and director of the University of Arizona’s Center for Consciousness Studies. Consciousness rests in the […]