Mindful Happiness

Anthony Quintiliani, Ph.D, LADC

  • Home
  • Dr. Anthony Quintiliani
    • About
  • Mindful Happiness
  • Mindful Expressions Meditation CD
  • Contact

July 1, 2018 By Admin

Liberation of the True Self

Liberation of the True Self

Socrates is reported to have noted that “the secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old but on building the new.” In Buddhism there are clear relationships between “no-self” and the force of impermanence, that reality that ensures constant change and thus personal dissatisfaction as a norm.  In the lived experiences of our psychological turmoil we humans do the utmost to direct our energy to obtaining what we want (attachment, desire, craving) and avoiding as much pain and suffering as possible. Our endless effort to obtain material and status goals for some form of inner security against the world repeatedly leads us to struggle, fear, and loss – suffering. Our cognition, emotion, behavior and sensory contact with all phenomena are fully engaged in evaluation of everything: did I get what I wanted and avoid suffering for now or not? This is the hedonic treadmill of lived attachment and avoidance. Cognitive-Behavioral analytics ends up in the same place over and over again: short-term pleasure (getting what I want for now)  and longer-term suffering  (fear of losing it or being involved in more emotional pain).  This state of constant seeking (how many “likes” do I have?) tricks us into thinking that this time, it will work. We seek safety, security, and various forms of wealth; we expect to achieve these goals and to avoid as much suffering as possible. This is impossible, since the seeking and attaching itself eventually causes more personal suffering. We humans have very short memories when it comes to the realities of pleasure and pain, happiness and suffering. Our emotional striving to be perfect and get ahead often leave us with just more desire.  The sad fact is that no matter how successful we are in accumulating all the goodies, we tend to continue our suffering sometimes in different forms.

A possible solution to consider for liberating yourself from the merry-go-round of life’s seeking and avoiding is to practice intensive, regular deep meditation and yoga. Through these regular/daily practices you will, indeed, confront yourself and perhaps open a pathway to spiritual freedom. You may liberate your true self in the process. Narrowly focus on your consciousness – the mirror of your true self.  It does not change even when the content of experience does change. Become your observing self in a state of pure awareness without judging or evaluating. In the evolutionary process, clinging is one of the most primal actions. The “vapor of thoughts” along with strong attachment clinging causes our norms to be related to our false self – with its entitlement, feeling special as a defense, greed, anger, even hatred.  Just STOP all of this process as much as you can; focus on who/what you are at the deepest most spiritual levels. Who am I is the eternal and most important question. As you meditate and do yoga, concentrate on radically accepting everything that has happened to you and may still be happening to you.  This does not mean stand by and allow yourself to be abused by cruel people; however, it does mean to pay very acute attention to what experiences trigger your ego-defenses and negative reactions in thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. How much control over your emotions are you willing to give up to other people?  Radically accept as a norm, do your asanas, meditate often, allow your true self to “let go” of the false self”s ego and superego demands. Pursue spiritual practices, be compassionate and generous, and live the life your true self desires for you. This is a life of more inner peace, even tranquility, more happiness, less competition, more love, and DOING good for others. This path is difficult in our materialistic world. The fruits of your efforts will be gratifying! If you practice, you will discover the truth about being a happier, more lovable person.

If you are not satisfied with the outcomes from your efforts here are three more things to practice. When you become entangled in the ego defenses of your mind, use the Buddha’s “best friends.” Calming breath, the half smile, standing, sitting, walking or laying down all may change your neurophysiology and thus your mood and level of self-control. This will allow you better capacity to apply radical acceptance and let go of harmful  emotional reactivity.  Another approach championed by the Buddha is to gently control your second arrows.  The first arrow is when something unpleasant happens to you and there is nothing you can do about it; this is pure suffering, and it is painful.  However what you decide to have your mind, body and emotions do with the first arrow of suffering is called the second arrow.  This very sharply pointed arrow can lead to long-term, even life-long suffering about something you failed to radically accept and let go. Become an expert in perceiving the initial activity of your second arrows, and STOP as soon as possible. At this point you may apply RAIN – recognize what if happening; accept it; investigate causation; and, apply no-self or if less skilled “its not about me attitudes.” These follow-up practices should be very helpful to you in your effort to become a more calm and more happy person.

For more details see Singer, M. A. (2007). The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself. Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, pp. 127-137.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: Breathing, Buddhism, Calming, Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, Featured, Inner Peace, M.A.Singer, Meditation, MIndfulness, Self Care, True Self Tagged With: BUDDHISM, CALMING, LIBERATION OF TRUE SELF, M.A.SINGER, MEDIATION, THE UNTETHERED SOUL

June 24, 2018 By Admin

Meditation at the Deepest Levels

Meditation at the Deepest Levels

In 2007 M. A. Singer’s The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself, opened up a whole new, deeper perspective on why consciousness or pure awareness is the root of self. Even in a Buddhist  “no-self” view, Singer’s inquiries leave us with a great deal to unravel.  Here are some reasons why Singer’s believes that deep meditation is the highest form of pure awareness in the self as the observing being.

  1. Deep meditation, beyond the experience of single-pointed concentration, bring you into an experience where you are observing/experiencing consciousness or awareness itself.
  2. This deep meditative experience is consciousness pointed back to itself. It is ultimate you!
  3. As inner and outer worlds integrate into a single state, you “see” the true nature of self.
  4. Because only deep and prolonged meditation can focus consciousness on our true nature, it is the “highest state” of being.  The observing self is the seat of consciousness, your root of all being.
  5. Romana Maharshi’s question of “Who am I?” is fused within this deep meditative state.
  6. There are no more emotional projections, unending cognitions, rising and falling emotions, incessant evaluations, cravings – just inner peace with observation of the true self. A “felt sense” of safety.
  7. For some this deep meditative experience is the source of special spiritual experiences.
  8. The non-attachment to “people, places, and things” allows us to let go of all judgments.
  9. Our sensory contact with objects, phenomena, experiences is at rest. We no longer have to desire or fear what comes next in life. Just radically accept the now.
  10. Welcoming impermanence and change without ego infections bring us joy and happiness.
  11. This you as watcher is the state of your intuitive self, and may be the path to connection with boundless emptiness in space and time.  It may be your connect to great wisdom.
  12. With these new perspectives on personal experience, you suffer less, have more joy, and may attain both personal happiness and great enlightenment.
  13. Perhaps these are the experiences so valued by Buddha, Christ and Maharshi. This ultimate formlessness may be discomforting for some who may not yet be ready for it. You are the change that so often in the past has caused great suffering.  In deep meditation, you learn to allow it all.

For more information refer to Singer, M. A. (200-7). The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself.Oakland, CA: New Harbinger Publications, pp. 31-38.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: Activities, Benefits of Meditation, Featured, M.A.Singer, Meditation, Meditation Activities Tagged With: DEEP MEDITATION, M.A.SINGER, MEDITATION, MINDFULNESS, THE UNTETHERED SOUL

Twitter

Mindful Happiness -Currently in Production

Mindful Happiness Posts

Building Emotional Resilience On a personal note, right now I am suffering.  Its April 15th and I have a terrible viral infection (sore throat, chest congestion, and fever).  I feel weak and miserable.  Perhaps all that frigid air we endured in New England this Winter also kept infectious “stuff” under control for a while. However, […]

Interpersonal Mindfulness Various forms of mindfulness-based compassion training help us to care more about the needs, happiness, and health of other people. However, direct applications of interpersonal mindfulness activates these influences into direct action on behalf of others.  Thus, if lucky, we learn to care more about others and less about ourselves.  The self-centered ego […]

From The Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation We humans have a unique way of perceiving and processing emotional experiences.  Years ago I developed a formula to understand the perception and  process of emotional experiences: CABS-VAKGO-IS/Rels.  The C stands for cognition; we spend a great deal of time thinking about pretty much everything we […]

Mindfulness Practices for Expanding Acceptance Mindfulness and contemplation can be great allies in our struggle to better understand each other.  This is especially true when it comes to matters of interpersonal relationships and highly significant relationships.  It is also important in diversity, or as some now refer to it – variation in human beings.   Variation may […]

Mindful Leadership Skills: How to Lead in Wise Mind Ways Researchers dealing with leadership skills have noted several acquired characteristics of effective leaders.  These same skills may be used in spreading “the word” about how mindfulness and wise mind practices reduce stress reactivity, enhance compassion, and expand the possibilities for human happiness, inner peace and […]

The Principles of Nature and Natural Healing This is an advanced post on Eastern views of healing. From ancient shamanic traditions all the way to today’s AMA approved procedures in energy medicine, healers have been trying to discover and integrate the foundations of nature into healing. This reality exists from shamanic rituals all the way […]

Vipassana Meditation:  Impermanence Although standard vipassana meditation practice leading to insight about the true nature of reality does not recommend what I am about to do, I plan to do it anyway. This meditation center is all about innovation in practice and generalization regarding the benefits of meditation for both regular meditators and novices.  Below […]

Meditation for Health Improvement It is estimated that between 10 and 15 million Americans participate in some form of regular mindfulness or contemplative practices; secular-based meditation and yoga may be the most common of these practices.  Many others practice tai chi, qi gong, forest-based contemplation, Taoism, etc.  The US National Institute of Health has been […]

Tips on Practice During These Troubling Times Some people are religious, and I am sure turn to those sources for support and hope. Others are spiritual, and I hope also pursue those sources for emotional stability and closeness to the “their” divine. Other people may  be Agnostic or Atheist; I am certain such people also […]

Money and Electronic “Friends” Are They Real ? The Sutta Nipata  (4.15, Translated by Thanissaro Bhikkhu) noted “Seeing people floundering like fish in small puddles, competing with one another…fear came into me. The world was entirely without substance….Wanting a haven for myself, I saw nothing that wasn’t laid claim to.  Seeing nothing in the end but […]

What is Mindfulness  – The Nature of Mindfulness This is an expanded second post on the nature of mindfulness.  This post will begin with secular understandings, and end with basic spiritual path information.  Generally mindfulness is a wide-ranging process with a special noticing quality.  It focuses the power of attention leading to improved concentration.  Mindfulness […]

Self-Care to Reduce Compassion Fatigue First let’s begin with what some people do to counteract the stressors of living in a hurried,“over-technologized” world. Technically, “technologize” is not a popularly accepted word, but it is a sad  reality. We live in a time when texting while driving may become the new addiction-based cause for many, many […]

Mindfulness Practices to help Reduce Your Worry & Suffering My last post dealt with various mindfulness-based practices and skills that may help to reduce created suffering due to excessive worrying.  I will add a few more practices in this post.  First, let us go back to Roman Emperor, Marcus Aurelius, and his Meditations. In Book 2, page 14 […]

“The Other Shore” to Happiness and Enlightenment Thich Nhat Hanh’s book, The Other Shore: A New Translation of The Heart Sutra…Berkeley, CA: Palm Leaves Press brings us on an inner journey toward a happier, more peaceful and enlightened life. Wisdom implies that we understand that life is made up of mental formations, no-self (more clarifications later), […]

Breathing Practices and Emptiness Here I will introduce you to five breathing practices, each one moving progressively closer and closer to emptiness/no-self experiences. Do your best to remain open in these practices. Notice the feel of your posture. Once comfortable notice your breath as it is. Relax and close your eyes if ok. Rest your […]

Using Meditation, Yoga and Breathing… You can Anchor your Choice Making A key outcome of serious practice is  that you now reduce auto-pilot reactivity to people, places, things, emotions, sensations, craving, and memories and at the same time notice your mind CAN BE in charge of your brain-body reactions.  Yes, regular daily mindfulness practice allows […]

Understanding Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy? Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (or Cognitive-Behavior Therapy, hereafter CBT) has been noted as the most common evidence-based therapy approach used in the United States.  That said, the most common “therapy” approach used here remains generic talk therapy with more or less psychodynamic characteristics. Given the absolute limited level of outcome-based evidence for effectiveness of […]

Loving Kindness – An Alternative Version The writings of Thich Nhat Hanh offer a different version of Loving Kindness Meditation or Metta (Pali). This version may be influenced by Buddhaghosa in Visuddhimagga (or The Path to Purification,  fifth century system of The Buddha’s teachings). The reality of no-self, or a static, permanent and inherent self is a core […]

Relational Suffering and Buddhist Practice Recently I experienced a deep, sudden, afflictive emotional experience. This sudden and profound sense of loss was due to temporary heartbreak; the temporary heartbreak dealt with rejection from a younger woman I found to be interesting and attractive (inside and outside). My “lost” person seemed to possess all the attachment […]

So Many Ways to Self-Medicate –  It Just Brings More Suffering Very often poor child-parent (child-caretaker) object relations, attachment with care takers, and attunement by care takers negatively impact young children early in their lives.  The well-documented scientific fact that environmental conditions play a more important role in gene-expression than pure genetics implies clearly that […]

Mindful Happiness Tags

ELEANOR R LIEBMAN CENTER EXERCISES MBSR SELF THERAPY. THICH NHAT HANH CLINICAL SUPERVISION MEDITATION SELF ESTEEM MEDITATION PRACTICE ENLIGHTENMENT MINDFUL MEDITATION WALKING MEDITATION MINDFUL PRACTICE HAPPINESS SUFFERING VIPASSANA VIPASSANA MEDITATION DR ANTHONY QUINTILIANI COVID-19 ANTHONY QUINTILIANI EMPTINESS ACTIVITY TRAINING SELF CARE MINDFULNESS BREATHING MINDFUL TRAINING MINDFULNESS TRAINING PRACTICES COMPASSION PSYCHOTHERAPY SELF COMPASSION BRAIN ACTIVITIES BUDDHISM ADDICTION JOURNALING TRAUMA WISE MIND VERMONT MINDFUL HAPPINESS SELF MEDICATION CONSCIOUSNESS

Mindful Categories

Mindful Happiness Pages

  • About
  • Contact
  • Dr. Anthony Quintiliani
  • Mindful Expressions Meditation CD
  • Mindful Happiness
  • Site Map

Copyright © 2021 · Mindful Happiness