Mindful Happiness - Page 2 of 52 - Anthony Quintiliani, Ph.D, LADC

January 30, 2020 By Admin

A Tribute to Ram Dass (Richard Alpert)

Recently Ram Dass died at his home in Maui. He was 88 years old. He was born into a well-off Boston family, and enjoyed materialism in his early professional years. When completing a Ph.D. in Psychology at Stanford University he was still into material things. His spiritual awakening did not exist. He was once known for his psychedelic drug experimentation while teaching at Harvard University. This experimentation occurred in the 1960s and 1970s, and in 1963 he was fired from Harvard for related reasons. In 1967 he went to India to study under Hindu Sadhu Neem, Karoli Baba, also known as Maharaj-ji. Before his teacher died, Alpert was named Ram Dass (Servant of God). He practiced bhakti yoga – pure love on the spiritual path. In 1974 Ram Dass returned to the United States, where he developed his own style of meditation, a style that radically integrated various forms of spiritual traditions. In 1971 he published his first book, Be Here Now; this book helped open up higher consciousness to others without the use of drug and expounded a life role of service to others. In 2004 Ram Dass relocated to Maui, where he remained for the rest of his life. In 1997 he wrote Still Here. In some ways this book helped to clarify his deeper understanding of himself; the depth was the result of a serious stroke he suffered. His cerebral hemorrhage forced him to go deeper into self-understanding. In 2004 he survived a near-fatal infection. From his stroke on Ram Dass was mainly homebound. His last book (with Mirabai Bush) was Walking Each Other Home:Conversations on Living and Dying.

To the end he faced his death with great human grace, and he never gave up his view that to live must involve to love and serve others. Ram Dass, sometimes with the help of others, also established various organizations to provide teachings and service to others. Here is a short list: Hanuman Foundations (the teachings of Neen Karoli Baba); Love Serve Remember Foundation; Prison Ashram Project; Co-creating Living Dying Project and Doorway to Light; Seva Foundation (healthcare for underserved areas); and, Social Venture Network (for businesses). Yes, Ram Dass lived his talk – he walked the walk!

With the passing of Ram Dass, we have lost a great spiritual and meditation teacher. There are few and far between equivalent replacements. May he rest in great inner peace as he travels the bardo.

For more information refer to Duncan Oliver, J. (January, 2020). Ram Dass, beloved spiritual teacher, has died. In Tricycle. See tricycle.org/trikedaily/ram-dass-dies/.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

January 22, 2020 By Admin

Brief Update on America’s Opioid Problems-2020

America’s Opioid Problem-2020; A Brief Update

Unfortunately, Opioid Use Disorder (OUD) is alive and well in 2020. Today approximately 150 People are dying each day due to opioid overdose. The CDC noted that from 1999 to 2017 approximately 399,000 people died in the United States from Opioid overdose. Related to chronic pain, this is one of the greatest failures in American medicine; perhaps, now medical training (as well as all mental health and social work training) will include sufficient clinical exposure to Substance Use Disorders ((SUD). Sufficient exposure goes way beyond Motivational Interviewing. Since many recognize addictions as America’s number one healthcare problem, all healthcare providers and school counselors, social workers, psychologist, etc. should receive proper clinical training in the prevention, intervention, and treatment of SUDs. It is about time!

Although in most parts of the country opioid dependence is still quite common, there is hope. Medically Assisted Treatment is being used, which in the best cases (Vermont’s model) includes medications to help reduce opioid cravings and psychoactive effects AND counseling to resolve mental health and addictions problems that lead to OUD in the first place. I, myself, a long time ago was part of a clinical team that established the first methadone clinic in Vermont under the jurisdiction a community mental health center (The Howard Center). As Clinical Director, and with lots of clinical experience and training in co-occurring disorders and the help of many, we were ready to act. Some thought Vermont did not need such a clinic, but on our first day of operation we had a waiting list of over 100 people hoping to receive these services. There is a risk here: current funding models short-change the clinical psychosocial interventions and enhance the medical interventions. For treatment to work long-term, people need BOTH! Even if people are successful at harm reduction regarding OUD, relapse is just around the corner if they do not receive therapy for pre-existing psychological problems (anxiety, depression, trauma, other addictions, and eating disorders). It is estimated that 90% of clients who do not take MAT medications may relapse. MAT with psychosocial clinical interventions sports a success rate of about 50%, which is great considering the severity of OUD. Let’s not be penny-wise and dollar-foolish; let’s not reduce psychosocial interventions that prevent relapse and enhance long-term health status.

For more information refer to The National Psychologist, 28(1), Winter, 2020, pages 1 and 5.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

January 12, 2020 By Admin

Two Forms of Self-Help Journaling

Self-Help Journaling – Two Methods

Generally there are two forms of self-help journaling: writing about worries and concerns OR writing about joy and happiness. In my more than 35 years of clinical experience I have not found the former to be very helpful. Most people stuck in negative mood states are not easily able to disengage themselves from negative, worrisome thoughts. For these folks journaling and placing more cognitive and emotional attention on negatives is often unhelpful. So I stopped recommending this form of journaling to clients years ago. If you suffer from anxiety, depression, trauma, addictions and/or eating problems, I would not recommend negative problem solving journaling as a practice. Our limbic brain sets us up for overdrive when dealing with negative emotions and experiences, so no need to add more cognition and attention to it all. Better to work on positives!

I have found positive journaling to be amazingly helpful for some people. The practice is quite easy. Simply find a journal you like to look at and hold. Yes, visual and kinesthetic pleasures are important as motivators. Place it near your bed, and every night a few minutes before you go to bed do some journaling – even a few minutes can be helpful. Just write freely, without censoring in any way. It is a good idea to use all your sensory experiences here. What did you see, hear, feel, smell, taste, experience that you may wish to write about? Once you get into the process, try to go a bit deeper: exactly what was it about the positive experience that impacted you, and how deeply? Do your best not to seek ideal happiness experiences (there may not be nirvana); these realities are far and few for most people. So best to begin with simply paying more attention to positives during the day. You may begin to notice that some of the experiences and things you have been conditioned to take for granted are actually positive in nature. Pick only one experience to write about. Later go back often and re-read what you wrote.

For more information refer to J. Smiechowski’s ideas in Easy Health Options Home; MedicalXpress; Journal of Psychophysiology; and University of Rochester, Journaling for Mental Health.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

December 31, 2019 By Admin

Behaviors People Display When in Groups

After more than 35 years of facilitating hundreds of classes, workshops, family therapy sessions, group therapy sessions, and work project groups it has become clear that we do some strange things when we participate in groups. It appears to me that many of these in-group functions serve both ego and limbic needs. Yes, our prefrontal brain and our lower brain regions (limbic and rewards) play important (if outdated) roles in how humans function in group settings. Here I will simply list a sampling of such behaviors. Many of these behaviors need to be observed, assessed, utilized, and sometimes addressed if a group leader/facilitator/therapist will be successful. Here is the short list of what to observe and use.

Underlying messages and beliefs signaled by behavior and/or facial/emotional expression;
Patterns of communication within the group, both verbal and nonverbal;
Emotional acting out as process or diversion;
Sub-group alliances, both short-term and long-term;
Behavioral changes when the make up of group members change;
The way social and emotional influence are used;
How personal power is used;
Patterns of activity – acting out/ acting in, etc.;
When silence dominates;
Patterns of hostility, cooperation, compassion, caring, etc.;
Possible hidden agendas;
Possible secrets between members;
The openness and closeness of the group and its process;
The power of truth in what is shared and shown;
How people look at each other, and how they address each other;
Self and other oriented talking;
How blame is used;
Willingness to allow others to speak for you – or not; and,
Consistent roles people tend to play.

Although this is a partial list, the best solution is the same: speak truth; share power; protect group process; protect others; do no harm; deeply listen with all your senses; be as kind as possible; be as compassionate as possible; and do your best to help the group achieve its goals. For an interesting view of this process (one based on human doubt), see Abblett, M. (2018). The Five Hurdles to Happiness and the Mindful Path to Overcoming Them. Boulder, CO: Shambhala Publications, pp. 170-218.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

December 24, 2019 By Admin

Journaling and Grief Process

Regular brief journaling may be helpful in your grief and horror regarding significant personal losses of self and/or others. Here are the various ways it may be helpful to you.

Writing and reading about your personal loss experience may help you to make sense of the process, and at the same time guide you gently on that path.
Journaling may open up past and present realities – both positive and negative – about your loss experience.
At times anger, resentments, and regrets will come up. These realities open you up to the depth of the grief experience. Do not linger too long there!
S. Kierkegard reminded us that our lived experiences are processed forwardly, but better understood if observed backwards. Journaling helps to focus us on the present but never lets go fully of the past.
It may be important to you to make your personal journal more balanced with both negative and positive experiences. For example, it may be helpful to list all simple pleasures you experienced in any given day. It may also be a good idea not to linger emotionally too long when such experiences trigger negative states.
I have always found it helpful to list my personal gratitudes, even in the midst of painful loss and suffering. It is not uncommon for the most valued experiences to be linked with the lost love-object and your shared life.
If fear and trepidation occur as you move through the grief process, I suggest that you break down the scary moments into smaller, more manageable periods of time, space, and emotions.
Pay attention to and write about both helpful and unhelpful thoughts, emotions, behaviors, and sensations related to your grief process. Be aware keenly of small improvements in all.
You may notice that as you slowly heal you spend less time journaling. This is natural.
You may wish to do “grave worship” practices, or simply write many good things about the lost person.
V. Frankl noted that when we cannot change the reality of a situation, we may have to change ourself.
When you find yourself crying over your loss, that is a very good time to contemplate and do journaling.
Reading related poetry or writing your own may help you.
If and when you experience the emptiness of the void inside, do your best to find words for the experience. And, work to fill that void by re-engaging with your life as it is now.
It is always a good idea to develop and practice personal rituals about your healing. Write about this in your journal.
S. Becket reminded us that we must go on! As painful as it may be, we cannot stop the process.
As P. Chodron noted, we must allow it all to fall apart before we can find the resilience to face what comes next. In most situations, what comes next is slow improvement in your emotional condition.
Rest in peace with your breath, and do more meditation or yoga if that suits you well.
You may wish to visit optionb.org or other sites that support grief work.

Refer to Sandberg, S. and Grant, A. (2017). Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy. New York: A. A. Knopf, pp. 58-76.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton Sangha

Author of Mindful Happiness