Practices Archives - Page 11 of 13

October 27, 2014 By Admin

More Compassion and Self-Compassion Needed

Today’s Troubled World Needs More Self Compassion and Compassion

This is an interactive activity on contemplation between your executive brain, your conscious mind, and your emotional brain areas.

Looking at the world today any aware person must admit the human race is in serious trouble. This reality impacts the developing, industrial, and post-industrial cultures of the world. Let’s list only 11 serious concerns about the state of the world and our own country.

My list will not be in any specific order of difficulty.

Here is the list of problems.

1) Rampant greed – more poverty, more hunger, even clean water financial speculation, and possibly more SES/class violence;

2) Extremely high levels of mental illness, especially depression, anxiety, substance misuse, trauma, eating disorders, etc.;

3) Dramatically increasing levels of childhood mental illness (for the USA) with earlier ages of onset;

4) Global climate change and its effects;

5) More self-centered, immediate gratification-based entitlement;

6) Greater narcissistic grasping, with extreme levels of inner insecurity and outer aggression;

7) Probable devaluation of the US dollar as the world’s currency standard (lots and lots of disruption with this one);

8) More terrorism and more HATE;

9) Increasing levels of digital, electronic addictions – with brain plasticity implications of “me first,” frustration intolerance, shorter attention span, a way to obtain one’s dopamine fix for the day;

10) For the USA and many other countries, generally ineffective federal governments; and,

11) Pessimism about the future, so more “me first,” I/me tendencies for material grasping.

Quite a serious list!

Some of these conditions may improve; we just have no idea which ones will become less severe. To help you deal with the “ups” and “downs” of all this trouble, I invite you to participate in a contemplation activity. This activity will use some of The Dalai Lama’s personal advice. After each recommended practice, I encourage you to contemplate your responses to the instructions.

If you modify unhelpful habits, be kind to yourself. It is difficult to change unhelpful habits to healthful habits.

Be gentle with yourself.

Brief Meditation/Yoga Practice on a Daily Basis – Please contemplate on three benefits you may obtain by following this recommended practice.

Real World Regular Practices of Compassion, Self-Compassion and Kindness – Please contemplate on three benefits you may obtain by following this recommended practice.

Improving Your Emotion Regulation By Practicing #1 and # 2 Above – Please contemplate on three benefits you may obtain by following this recommended practice.

Practicing unconditional “love” (at least liking) of yourself on a regular basis – Please contemplate on three benefits you may obtain by following this recommended practice.

Please read over your 12 expected benefits. :let’s hope you find them motivating.

For more information refer to: The Dalai Lama (2007). (Ed. C. Kelly-Gangi). The Dalai Lama: His Essential Wisdom. New York: Fall River Press, pp. 15-32.

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE to Order!

October 7, 2014 By Admin

Mindfulness to Expand Acceptance of Others

Mindfulness Practices for Expanding Acceptance

Mindfulness and contemplation can be great allies in our struggle to better understand each other. This is especially true when it comes to matters of interpersonal relationships and highly significant relationships. It is also important in diversity, or as some now refer to it – variation in human beings. Variation may be a better term; it implies there are variations in all humans. Since variation exists inside and outside typical human groups (women, men, racial and ethnic groups, religions, etc.), it may be a more normative term to signify a noticed difference in any person. Since variation (diversity) among people is a highly observable difference, it may sometimes influence our deeper insecurities: this person is like me or not like me.

In mindfulness traditions, we strive to accept others as complete equals and to be in a state of compassion and acceptance with them. All people are born, suffer, experience joy, become old and/or ill, then die at some point. We are ALL experiencing the same process living here on earth. We all suffer, experience joy, and we all will die at some time in the future.

Keeping these ideas in mind, please participate in the following mindful awareness activity dealing with human variation. This is a positive stereotyping activity. You are being asked to use mindful contemplation to think of positives in other people who present with variation – not exactly like you.

Please follow the steps listed below.

A) List five groups of people with variation – these groups are different in race, ethnicity, religion, social-economic status, etc. The five groups are NOT exactly like you.

B) Although these five groups of people have variations that you do not have, please contemplate about each group AND at least one positive trait you believe they possess. This is positive stereotyping; positive stereotyping is being used to have you experience something a bit different regarding your usual views about variations in humans.

NOW go back to the five groups and write at least one positive trait you do believe each group possesses.

C) As you read over what you have written, contemplate on each group and any positives you listed.

D) As you completed this mindful activity did you notice any biases that came up for you? If yes – what came up?

E) As you completed this mindful activity, did you notice any feelings of compassion that came up about any of the groups or their struggles? If yes – what came up?

F) As you completed this mindful activity, did you notice any subtle shifts in your own perspectives about any of these groups? If yes – what shifted?

Hopefully mindful activities like this one may be helpful in softening your own heart about others – and, perhaps, about yourself.

Compassion, acceptance, and understanding can go a long way in improving relations with others. This is particularly true if the others possess human variations you do not possess.

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE to Order!

September 30, 2014 By Admin

Mindfulness in Journal Writing

Mindfulness Expands the Art of Journal Writing

T. Merton, J. Kerouc, I. Progoff, J. Upton, and others have helped to expand the art or journal writing practice. This type of practice can become your mindfulness practice. You will need to write on a daily basis (even if briefly), and you will need to be highly mindful in the process.

Here is a list of suggestions that may improve your mindful journal writing practice.

Know your intentions, be fully aware, and remain in the present moment.

Pay attention to, concentrate on, and contemplate about your journal writing content.

When you are essence-seeking, utilize J. Upton’s idea on the aperture of awe for inspiration.

Appreciate your willingness to write, inspire yourself to write, be curious, and appreciate the actual act of writing.

Sit in silence just before you begin to write about your inner personal and emotional experiences.

Your experiences will be projected onto the pages of your journal – allow this to flow and notice!

Take a brief mindfulness/contemplative break periodically; be with and one-with what you have written.

You can write about readings, experiences with self and others, or ask and answer questions about life.

Tell stories and narratives about important and less-than-important events and experiences.

Use your mind-body-spirit to connect with your emotions – then write.

Be mindful in the entire process.

Use all your senses and sensory recall about events and experiences.

Witness, behold, and listen inwardly before you write. Repeat this process after you read what you have written.

Allow the journal writing practice to be a meditation.

Consider writing only about positive, helpful events and experiences (if that works best for you).

Hopefully these suggestions will motivate you to write more, write better, or to begin to write of you do not now do so.

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE to Order!

For more information refer to: Barbezat, D. P and Bush, M. (2014). Contemplative Practices in Higher Education. San Francisco, CA: Jossey-BNasss/ Wiley, pp. 110-136. See also Progoff, I. (1992). At a Journal Workshop: Writing to Access the Power of the Unconscious to Evoke Creative Ability. New York: Penguin/Putnam.

September 9, 2014 By Admin

Self Medicate Suffering

So Many Ways to Self-Medicate – It Just Brings More Suffering

Very often poor child-parent (child-caretaker) object relations, attachment with care takers, and attunement by care takers negatively impact young children early in their lives. The well-documented scientific fact that environmental conditions play a more important role in gene-expression than pure genetics implies clearly that the quality of early life experiences activate long-term consequences in the lives of humans. Let’s take an informal look at the various forms of self-medication (short-term habitual behaviors to add brief experiences of fleeting joy or to escape personal suffering) used commonly in American society.

What is wrong with America? We lead the world in consumption of mind-altering substances – is the emptiness in our souls too, too large and deep? Our compulsive substance use reflects a hungry ghost perspective. Addictions of all kinds cannot be an effective substitute for LOVE!

Here is a limited list.

Substance use for various reasons – Users hope for periods of brief joy as positive reinforcement and/or escape from and avoidance of suffering as negative reinforcement.
Substance use for various mental health sufferings – Users learn that certain substances have a brief impact on their suffering in depression, anxiety, trauma, fear, social phobia, and emotion dysregulation.
Workaholism – We learn early that good work habits imply better success, but we overwork to escape things and/or to build internal security or compensate for insecurity.
Out-of-control consumerism – We love to buy, buy, buy even when we cannot pay, pay, pay. Do we need or just want?
Compulsive eating – Self-medicating often leads to obesity, then sometimes to diabetes, and other types eating disorders. Emotional eating is a very common problem in America. Supersize me! And that is exactly what happens.
Social dependency – We appear to have an extreme fear of being alone. It may be that empty soul again.
Extreme perfectionism – Some of us learn this as a way to cover up private insecurities and/or to obtain contingent positive self-esteem and self-concept. It may also be a behavior to obtain social-emotional value and respect from significant others.
Sex addiction and sexual rages/compulsions – Interesting that our sexist society commonly refers to women here, even with diagnostic formats. What about men?
Various self-medicating behaviors in mental health areas – Depression, anxiety, trauma, fear, social phobia and others; each one has its own forms of self-medicating the clinical conditions, and these forms go BEYOND substance use alone.
Excessive aggression – Even harming others may produce some form of reinforcement as a contingent means to control situations, dominate people, and/or escape pain. In non-war environments we lead the world in the number of people killed by gunfire. Where is our emotional regulation?

A very long time ago, the Buddha (in the Brahmajala Sutta) noted that there are many, many things we may become over-attached to. This form of attachment can lead to suffering – suffering due to loss of what we want; suffering due to any change; suffering due to general impermanence in life; and, suffering due to old age and illness.

If you discovered your form of self-medication in the list above, consider obtaining competent professional help to modify your habitual trends. Another option could be to do DAILY practice of mindfulness-based stress reduction skills. Obtain competent professional help to learn these wise-mind skills AND practice them daily. In time (perhaps as little as 8-12 weeks according to neuroscience research), brain plasticity changes may occur; you may then notice your unhelpful self-medication is slowly being replaced with a more helpful and healthy habit. Best of luck on your personal journey to better physical and psychological health.

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE to Order!

For more information refer to Mate, G. (2018, 2010). In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addictions. Berkeley, CA: North Atlantic Books, pp. 223-259.

September 8, 2014 By Admin

Total Human Experience in Brain Habits

Brain Habits – Helpful Vs Unhelpful

Nora Volkow, MD, Director, National Institute on Drug Abuse ( video below) has noted that people suffering from addictions may experience some dysfunction in in brain areas related to personal motivation, reward recognition, and inhibitory controls. Neuroscientists have utilized various brain imaging techniques to document this possibility in addicted individuals. These finding bring us to a new look at ALL addicted behaviors as possible forms of brain-based disease (brain area, neuronal, neurotransmitter malfunctions, habitual behaviors, and their related plasticity). This more scientific research on addiction as disease moves well beyond common views noted in AA/12 Steps (it is a disease so it is not your fault); this more scientific research is specific to the brain’s role in developing and maintaining unhelpful, addictive habits. Such habits often follow the escape from pain and approach to pleasure principles so well established in scientific psychology. Core research has focused mainly on alcohol-drug addictions; however, a reinforced habit is a reinforced habit as far as brain functioning is concerned. It is true that chemical addictions add specific molecular realities to addicted behaviors – molecular basis for instrumental and classical conditioning of habitual behaviors leading to recognized changes in the brain’s reward centers. All addictive behaviors – all unhelpful habits – narrow personal motivation to the rewarding effects, enhance craving for the rewarding effects, increase fear of being without the rewarding effects, and reduce one’s ability to slow or stop the habitual behavior itself. Because people are self-medicating their moods and emotions, they tend NOT to learn more effective life coping skills (mindfulness, etc.), thus becoming even more dependent on the unhelpful habit for short-term relief of suffering and, perhaps, some intermittent joy. It is quite common for depression, anxiety, fear, trauma, and other serious life challenges to be the emotional bases for initial self-medicating behaviors.

To assist readers in their personal efforts to attain mindful, wise mind skills – thus reducing the impact and probability of unhelpful habits and addictions – I am expanding this post to include more on my conceptual process about CABS-VAKGO-IS-Rels. These letters represent: Cognition, Affect, Behavior, Sensorimotor, Visual, Auditory, Kinesthetic, Gustatory, Olfactory, Intuitive, Spiritual, and Relational REALITIES on how humans function emotionally inside and outside of their own brain-mind and body. This is the reality in human functioning, both helpful and unhelpful. By focusing your attention on the various categories of human emotional experience (CABS-VAKGO-IS-Rels), you may be able to identify the areas of your brain that are helping you to maintain health and happiness AND the the areas that are moving you into poor health and more suffering. Try to problem solve by noting what areas are your working allies to remain safe, productive, and happy as well as what areas serve as your ENEMIES.

Yes, even if you derive some brief pleasure or respite from suffering from an unhelpful or addictive habit (via self-medication), this short-term emotional strategy ALWAYS leads to more suffering in both the original “thing” you are trying to escape AND in future addictions that simply add to your suffering and stress load. This is not difficult: find out which areas help you and which areas harm you; do more in the areas that help you, and do less in the areas that harm you. Obtain qualified, licensed professional help as needed.

This formula may be helpful:

Internal/External Cues/Stimuli (people, places, things, experiences) – LEAD TO } Thoughts, Beliefs, Emotions, Behaviors – LEAD TO } Consequences of the Selected Behaviors

If the consequences of the behavior are reinforcing (releasing dopamine in the brain’s reward centers) – you got what you wanted and the behavior is far more apt to continue until it becomes just about automatic (no other skills, neuronal sensitization, and brain plasticity).

Unhelpful Behaviors LEAD TO more suffering AND Helpful Behaviors LEAD TO less suffering/more happiness.

I hope you are able to use this information and wise mind skills to improve your emotional life – starting right now!

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE to Order!