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Anthony Quintiliani, Ph.D, LADC

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December 18, 2019 By Admin

How to Offer Personal Tribute to Those Who Have Died

How to Offer Personal Tribute to Those Who Have Died

The Four Noble Truths tell us sobering news. There is suffering, and impermanence of all things including us and our loved ones. Below I have listed several thing you can do to HONOR a person you have lost.  Here is the list.

  1. Recall a special time before or at the time of death, and consider it a sacred place in space and time. Honor it and the person with the complete softness of your loving heart.  Do this now if you wish to.
  2. Pray for the person you have lost – and the goodness in that lost relationship.  You can do this if you are agnostic, even atheist. The prayer is to honor the loved person not to one of many gods.
  3. Go to your soft, suffering heart and fill it with joyous remembrances of your time with the person. Yes, the person has moved beyond; however, your internal and emotional memories are quite vibrant. They have made a special place for them self in your soul.
  4. You can carry this to a deeper level by seeing and touching special objects that belonged to the deceased.  Or, you can set up a small shrine in your home to pay respect and honor whenever you wish to do so.
  5. Know that the deceased person would want you to recall your joy, so light up your senses and recall in mild meditative state the pleasant and happy experiences you both shared.  If something happened with them that made you laugh, go there! This is what they wish for you.
  6. Listen to the music the lost person enjoyed, or read something inspirational.
  7. Think carefully of all the ways you could say goodbye again. Do it now if you wish to.
  8. Recall the smile on their face, and smile back. You may be surprised at how powerful this experience may be.
  9. Dedicate meritorious behavior to them. If you wish, set up some special program or fund to champion causes they cared about. The financial level is far less important than the emotional level of actually doing something.
  10. Write a special tribute about them in a journal. Write often, and read what your have written again and again.
  11. Lastly, work carefully to discover some ways to celebrate that person’s life and your relationship. Celebrate often and be calm within the warmth of your love.

For more information refer to Reoch, R. (1997). To Die Well: A Holistic Approach for the Dying and Their Caregivers. New York: Harper. See also Holecek, A. (2013). Preparing to Die: Practical Advice and Spiritual Wisdom from the Tibetan Buddhist Tradition. Boston: Snow Lion, pp. 312-314.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC  

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon

Filed Under: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, Compassion, Coping, Death, Deep Mindfulness, Featured, Gratitude Meditation, Grief, Letting Go, Meditation, Mourning, Rituals, Self Care, Spiriuality, Tributes Tagged With: HONOR, LOVING, OFFERINGS, PRAYER, TRIBUTES

November 1, 2019 By Admin

Meditation for Managers and Helpers – Let Me Help Your Organization!

Meditation for Managers and Helpers 

Let’s Talk – Contact Me – Click Here

I am a Licensed Psychologist-Doctorate and a Licensed Alcohol and Drug Counselor with 35 years of clinical experience in community clinics, schools, professional organizations, and universities (OSU, UVM, etc.). I have been the past Clinical Director of Howard Center, and Past President of the Vermont Psychological Association. I have provided clinical training on various clinical topics to therapists from all over New England, and as far south at Alexandria, VA and as far west as SanDiego, CA. I serve as the head teacher at The Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont, home of the Monkton Sangha. I have published numerous clinical articles, books and workbook. The most recent being Mindful Happiness…  I provide various posts for my blog,  mindfulhappiness.org. For many years I have served as a State of Vermont (DMH, ADAP, AHS) trainer in co-occurring disorders. I also train for NEIAS and AdCare New England. I have been practicing meditation since 1982.

This piece serves as an advertisement for local Vermont managers and therapists as well as a regular post on the blog. Below I will list the proven  benefits ( now thousands of studies on these) for managers and therapists who complete repeated meditation retreats and how the retreat process works. Managers and therapists who complete meditation retreats often report the following benefits. My own short retreats occur on a scheduled Saturday afternoon from 1 to 5/6 PM. Longer retreat periods are also available upon request. Participation is by invitation or you contacting me at anthony1@gmavt.net. My retreat costs are extremely affordable! More on retreat details after we review the benefits.

 Common Benefits of Meditation Retreats and Personal Practice –

  1. Expanded self-understanding
  2. Improved attentional focus
  3. Better focused awareness
  4. The personal experience of being present in mind and body
  5. Adjustments to silence and being without all electronic/digital devices (highly addictive)
  6. The possibility of noticed clarity
  7. Experienced forms of inner energy
  8. More centered calmness or activation
  9. Flowing with, complying or rejecting gentle meditation instructions
  10. Discovery of the many benefits of pure silence
  11. Letting go of day-to-day stressors and torments and simply settling into the “being” process – “choiceness awareness”
  12. Being open to unexpected emotions – could be joy, could be sadness, could be new, could be old, etc.
  13. Experience of staying with the arising emotions without attempts to flee them if unpleasant
  14. Ultimately improved emotional self-regulation
  15. With practice, improvements in anxiety, depression, trauma, and addictions (mainly emotion regulation)
  16. Noticing the phases:
  17. A) – Settling into the process and being at surface levels of awareness and experience; B) – Deepening into emotional realities of just BEING – deeper opening up to personal realities of past-present-future and not trying to escape anything positive or negative; C) – Slow re-adjustment to non-meditative experiences, and a readiness to enter into more typical personal experiences.

How I Manage My Own Silent Retreats (Typical Saturday Afternoon or for Longer Periods) –

  1. People arrive at 1 Pm for a brief social period and tea.
  2. At the sound of the singing bowl, we enter the living room and sit in a circle and listen to the day’s plan.
  3. Then we check in – voluntary. Do you wish to share your hopes for the day or share anything else with the group?
  4. We enter the retreat center for the Nine Bells Meditation, a brief meditation focused on any important person/s or relationship/s you have lost. It may also focus on something inside of yourself you feel you have lost.
  5. Loving Kindness Meditation follows the Nine Bells.
  6. We now do kinkin, or slower and silent walking meditation (outside weather permitting, inside if not).
  7. In warmer weather, we may add outside yoga, tai chi or qigong practices.
  8. We move back into the meditation room, where I lead meditations I have designed for your specific needs or retreat request.
  9. We do kinkin again.
  10. We sit in the circle in the living room again and write in our journals – voluntary. We are still silent. Bring a journal.
  11. We check out in our circle – voluntary sharing.
  12. You decide if you wish to take written copies of the meditation you experienced.
  13. You decide if you want meditation coaching from me at an agreed-upon, low cost.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC  

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, Conferences, Featured, Workshops Tagged With: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, CONFERENCES, RETREATS, WORKSHOPS

October 30, 2019 By Admin

Core Elements in Clinical Supervision

Core Elements in Clinical Supervision

In addition to what supervisors bring into group supervision and clinical training, the list below will be used for discussion about YOUR supervisory role. The order of content below is generally random. The content noted applies to clinical supervision; it could also apply to doing effective therapy. The skills and knowledges here make up a toolbox for effective clinical supervision. That said, it cannot include everything.

  1. DO NO HARM in all supervision modalities (individual, group, education/training)!
  2. Know your code of ethics, especially sections relating to clinical supervision, education/training, clinical relationship, and the role of technology.
  3. Understand how the past becomes the present – your own attachment and developmental history and experience. Your own “dragons.”
  4. Know how to use strong empathy and therapeutic alliance/relationship skills.
  5. Face the reality of co-occurring conditions in clinical practice. Even if your role is dealing with “the walking well,” there are most likely co-occurring conditions if not diagnoses.
  6. Know how to use and supervise 2-3 evidence-based therapies ( BT, CT, CBT, CBT-M, Process-Based CBT, DBT, DBT-S, MBSR, MBCT, MBRP, ACT, Narrative and Solutions-Oriented approaches, etc.
  7. Recognize that the EBTXs are the science behind the art of therapy. Client and supervisee  progress require both art and science.
  8. Experiment with creativity – but do no harm.
  9. Know how to use restructuring and reframing.
  10. Understand the science behind client-matching variables. Recognize the impact of anxiety, depression, trauma, addictions, etc.
  11. Do your best to use a bio-psycho-social-spiritual model. Pay attention to preferences of people you supervise. Never impose a narrow focus.
  12. Consider Quintiliani’s “neurotherapy” by using cognition, affect, behavior, sensory experiences (see, hear, feel,, etc.) as well as intuition, spirituality and relational variables and conditions.  Refer to the Attachment-CABS-VAKGO-IS-Rels model.
  13. Study more neuroscience and how it relates to cognitive and behavior change and the human mind-body system.
  14. Learn and use effective emotion regulation skills and practices.
  15. Focus on the impact of cognition (thoughts and deep structures), emotion, behavioral conditioning, social justice, marginalization, trauma (especially pre-verbal), addictions (include pesky cellphones), and mindfulness.
  16. Observe! Observe! Observe! (direct observation of the work) and Respect! Respect! Respect!
  17. Remain fully aware of possible transference and countertransference processes, especially projective identification.
  18. Know that context, personal aspiration, and personal values matter.
  19. Recognize parallel process from therapy to supervision and back again.
  20. Know that in most states the supervisor is 100% responsible for the actions of the people they supervise, even if those actions were not recommended or are unknown to you.
  21. Know how to use compassion in practical ways, especially with defensive ego-protective patterns in people.
  22. Never make identifications of the whole person as their clinical condition of diagnosis. In fact, add much more to the individualized interventions.
  23. As you observe and respect be a good mentor to motivate, but never forget client protection is the first priority. Their progress is a second priority.
  24. Know your roles: hire, fire, oversight, evaluate, train, support, organize, coordinate, and DOCUMENT. Know abut all HIPAA and 42 CFR Pt 2 requirements.
  25. Always use a written supervision contract/agreement, and recognize informed consent aspects as well as due process in it.
  26. In co-occurring work, seek a role for 12 Steps and/or peer recovery support.
  27. Keep strong BOUNDARIES in all aspect of this work.
  28. Pay attention to learning styles.
  29. Some of the work is a form of palliative care, in that counseling and therapy sometimes deal with life-or-death issues. It is a form of sacred work.
  30. Know about duty to warn and protect – and its various implications.
  31. Supervision (like therapy) needs to be structured but not rigid.
  32. Recognize that generic “talking” has very little empirical support for supporting change in serious co-occurring disorders.
  33. Be capable in dealing with conditions of potential suicide, self-harm, and harm to others.
  34. Supervision needs to be based on an agreement, a professional development plan, and change-oriented interventions, techniques, and processes. In the final analysis, the supervisor is in charge – final decision making re. competence of supervisees and protection of others.
  35. Look after your own self-development as lead clinicians and supervisors.
  36. All may fail if you do not attend to your own SELF-CARE and the self-care of the people you supervise.  Etc.!

Be well and reduce suffering!

 

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC  

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, Clinical Practice, Clinical Supervison, Featured, Quintiliani's Neurotherapy Tagged With: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, CLINICAL SUPERVISION, MINDFUL HAPPINESS, QUINTILIAN'S NEUROTHERAPY

October 27, 2019 By Admin

Crisis Resilience Skills

Crisis Resilience Skills  – Mindful Happiness

Below I will list various interventions that have proven effective in reducing the level of personal crisis. The sources for many of these skills came from Burns (1980), Ellis (1995), Seligman (1988), Linehan (1993, 2015)), Hayes (2018), and Thich Nhat Hanh (various publications). The skills noted are for immediate application in crisis and/or post-crisis practice. Due to space limitations, I will not explain details; rather I will list skills with minimum directions. If interested in improving your clinical capacities to deal with crises, you can look up the details on your own. It is a growth process. It is always a good idea to have a clear and practical crisis response plan.

  1. Move to cognition as soon as possible – get out of body reactions and take over the thought process related to the situation. Practice Tara Brach’s RAIN skills (recognize, accept, investigate, and relate to non-self), complete a pros and cons grid (good and not-so-good things about staying the same versus making small changes – CT, MI, CBT). Also distant or distract yourself quickly. Distraction is not to be used in physically dangerous situations.
  2. Practice mindfulness core skills. Begin relaxation breath with deep, slow breathing (polyvagal impediments may exist especially if poorly treated trauma is a reality), use positive imagery, meditate, do yoga, pray, pay attention to non-crisis variables, and live within the realities impermanence.
  3. Practice self-soothing. Remember or engage in positive images, sounds, touch, smells, and tastes. Carry your favorite self-calming scent with you. Rub your hands hard and long until hot, then place them on your face and absorb the healing warmth.
  4. DBT-like skills are highly effective. Use “wide-mind” skills. Try ACCEPTS. Engage in alternative activities, contribute to others, compare downwardly with others, engage in opposite emotion, push away unhelpful thoughts and move away from the situation, engage in productive thinking about what to do now without emotional dysregulation, and improve your sensations. Although not part of DBT, you may wish to practice progressing counting (distractive); say to yourself or outloud consecutive numbers and imagine them in your mind’s eye. Continue to count until the emotional reactivity has reduced.
  5. Practice mindful movement. Do yoga, tai chi, qi gong in more vigorous modes until you notice that your body has experienced a reduction in emotional reactivity. Regular meditation practice is, perhaps, your best option here.  Do vigorous exercise.
  6. Do your best to reduce a “victim” self-image. Work on fear-based reactions and combat hopelessness and helplessness tendencies. Use your older, experienced self’s wisdom.
  7. If in therapy, be certain to process the crisis experience. If your therapist is competent, she/he will include such skills development as part of your treatment.
  8. Hope this quick review has been helpful to you.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC  

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, Crisis Resilience Skills, Featured, MIndfulness, Nhat Hanh Thich, Resilience, Self Care, Trauma Tagged With: CRISIS SKILLS, RESILIENCE, SKILLS, TRAINING

October 18, 2019 By Admin

The Failed “War on Drugs” – Let’s Try Treatment On Demand and Fund It

The Failed “War on Drugs” – Let’s Try Treatment On Demand and Fund It

The New York based Drug Policy Alliance (drugpolicy.org) and other sources have provided some important information about our failed drug and alcohol policies. Here are a few astounding facts.  The United Stares has about 5% of the world’s population, but it uses approximately 70% of the worlds illicit drug.  In Mexico, our drug-users demand may be responsible for the decay of governmental control – the rise of powerful drug cartels. We incarcerate the highest level of people in the world, nearly 25% of the world’s prison population. With the highest incarceration rate in the world, in 2016 we incarcerated 2,205,300 people. Our population, especially the young, appear to have a “death wish” regarding the consumption of mind-altering substances. Are we Americans so, so emotional empty inside and lacking of all capacities for emotion regulation? Why do we need to self-medicate at such dangerous levels? We just experienced a medically-led nation-wide opioid crisis. Our alcohol industry, worse than the losses due to Opioids, lobbies very hard so very little interference occurs in their Big Profit Game. One might suggest the government does not wish to improve the substance-consumption problem. Now we may legalize various uses of marijuana; there are public health consequences here. At this time 33 states allow medical use of marijuana. And, of course we have, vaping! Who profits?

Our current strong addiction to electronic and digital devices is our new epidemic. Addiction to “I-Smart” phones and tablets  fuel texting-while-driving, with recent increase in highway deaths and injury. How utterly stupid! We are addicted to these devices (like the nicotine, alcohol, opioid, and vaping problems); the goal of electronic/digital engineers and behavioral psychologists hired by the industry to make sure we never put the device down and stay on it – even when driving.  We empty Americans will do almost anything to “connect” to something. Our emotional emptiness and poor self-regulation skills make us vulnerable to unmet emotional needs. We must “feel” connected – because we are NOT. D. W. Winnicott and S. Freud had something to say about these neurotic tendencies of emptiness. So, how many “likes” did you get today?  Time to wake up.

  1. It is estimated that the U.S. government spends approximately $47,000,000,000  a year on the “war on drug.”
  2. In 2017 1,632,921 Americans were arrested for drug related violations of law. In 2016 the number was 456,000, with 21% due to substance use problems.
  3. Nearly 660,000 people were arrested in 2017 for marijuana law violations, with about 90% being for simple possession.
  4. Even if the Black and Latino population makes up less than 32% off our total population, we arrested nearly 47% of those populations in our total drug-related arrests.
  5. In 2017 72,000 American died from a drug overdose. We are out-of-control!
  6. It may be possible to obtain $58,000,000,000 in tax revenue from the taxation and control of currently illegal drugs.
  7. President Barack Obama, William Buckley, Milton Friedman, and Noam Chomsky have publicly noted that our “war on drug” is a total failure.

Here is an idea. Let’s get serious about stopping the total deterioration of our nation due to drug and alcohol addictions. Let’s try complete treatment on demand – and fund it at realistic levels. Hopefully, such a change would include evidence-based interventions and recovery-oriented cooperation. Let’s see what the next administration does about our self-destructing, nation-wide problem.

Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC  

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont and the Home of The Monkton SanghaChiYinYang_EleanorRLiebmanCenter

Author of Mindful Happiness  

Mindful Happiness cover designs.indd

New Edition of Mindful Happiness in Production…Coming soon!

Filed Under: Addiction, ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, Featured, War on Drugs Tagged With: ANTHONY QUINTILIANI, DRUG POLICY ALLIANCE, WAR ON DRUGS

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