December 31, 2015 By Admin

Ideas about Attitudes of Gratitude – M. J. Ryan

Attitudes of Gratitude Thoughts and Applications

M. J. Ryan presents some interesting practices in the book, Attitudes of Gratitude (1999). Here are some ideas. Hope you will practice some of them soon. As The 14th Dalai Lama and Thich Nhat Hanh suggest, we should always appreciate the preciousness and miracle of human life – our own life no matter what the challenges are.

Understand that your emotional mood and the quality of your thoughts depend on where you place your attention and reflection. Do your best to pay more attention to the softness and warmth of your human heart and soul. Pay more attention to positive experiences and less attention to negative experiences.
When you are plagued with GIANT problems or BIG emotional reactions to not-so-giant problems, look into the nature of the problem itself to see if any solutions arise. Life is all about arising and falling experiences – both good and bad. Causes and conditions present and lead to pleasure, pain/suffering, or neutrality.
Pay much more attention to the little joys (“wonderment”) you may be missing by being on autopilot and rushing around trying to be happier trough material gain. Wealth and fame are nice, but they DO NOT bring lasting, inner happiness. Your happiness is an INSIDE JOB!
Do your best to be in the present moment of experiences. The past is gone; you cannot change it. The future is not here yet; you cannot control it. Your real power comes from responding to whatever is now in your present moment experience.
Pay much more attention to what is working for you now rather than what you desire and crave from the past or the future. If you are not present-minded, you cannot appreciate and have gratitude for what exists now.
Reflect upon and honor your close friends, your family, and your ancestors. Use any of their spiritual supports to do well in adversity and to do great in happy experiences.
Practice meditations on appreciation, gratitude, and loving kindness. These practices build your capacity to be happy. These practices also improve compassionate actions and self-compassion. Do you have self-compassion?
Periodically, live a whole day as if it were your last day living on earth. Notice! See what you decide to do.
In the final analysis, Buddhism informs us that life on earth will contain suffering, joy, and neutrality. All three conditions will occur in your experiences. You cannot escape suffering! How you respond will determine your level of satisfaction or your quality of life in the long run. Be happy! Be at peace! Be in the present moment!

For more information refer to Ryan, M. J. (1999). Attitudes of Gratitude: How to Give and Receive Joy Every Day of Your life. New York: MJF Books.

mindfulhappiness

By Anthony R. Quintiliani, PhD., LADC

From the Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation in Monkton, Vermont

Author of Mindful Happiness

CLICK HERE or any image below to Order

How Most People Learn in Psychotherapy It is highly important that clients learn from their therapists. In most cases this includes alternative ways of thinking, emoting, and behaving. So what can we learn from educational research on how people learn? Of course we all know it begins with a solid therapeutic alliance – the […]

Spirit Wars and “Spiritual Warfare” This post will discuss the topic and personal strategies. Most content will relate to both physical realities and metaphorical meanings and categories. Since a person viewing their self as fighting a spiritual war most likely holds onto certain parts of self in this endeavor, it is highly unlikely that the […]

Meditations and Mantra: Try Them Out in Your Practice There are many forms of meditation. In most cases, the common meditation forms fall into one of two categories: Mindfulness and Insight. There are also demanding concentration meditations, chakra meditations, and mantra meditations. Here we’ll deal only with the two forms noted above and the use […]

Alternative to Buddhism as Religion – Simply put and Clearly Stated In case you become too serious about yourself in this life, note that there are reportedly 400 trillion subatomic vibrations every second. So be humble! And being humble is something I have had to do regarding my experience with Zen Buddhism as my […]

How to Find & Choose an Effective Therapist Recently The Harvard Health Newsletter posted some interesting questions to ask while seeking out a psychotherapist. I will add a few more details and areas of inquiry in this post. Keep in mind that these questions and inquiries do not mean you will be happy and improve […]

Inner Workings of Self-Medication Process To continue our discussion about the self-medication process we will first turn to the human brain. The human brain is the most complex system known to science. Here, my comments will be basic. Self-medication often has roots in the quality of our earliest childhood experiences (attachment and object relations with […]

Quintiliani’s Brief Life Experience Screening Years ago, when I received a rather large number of managed care referrals for adolescent “treatment failures” and their families, I soon realized that typical screening, assessment and therapy was NOT working well. I tried so, so hard to reach these young people – all experiencing extreme psychological suffering with […]

Trauma: Object Relations Therapy Object relations therapists, D. W. Winnicott especially, have presented a logical analysis on how to provide object-relations-oriented therapy to people suffering from the effects of psychological trauma. Such attachment-based trauma therapy provides support and healing from trauma, loss and long-term trauma-effects. The interventions below combine the best of object relations therapy, […]

Meditation Process in Chan Buddhism Chan Master Changlu’s The Deportmant for Sitting Meditation (12th century China) is a clear and helpful set of instruction. 1) It begins with the making of a personal vow for great compassion, personal liberation, and samadhi – all for the purpose of delivering sentient beings from their suffering and to their […]

Making Boundless Space for Your Emotional Dragons In the past I have offered posts about radical acceptance and ways of dealing with your personal dragons or demons. Here I will offer a more advanced perspective on how directly engaging your emotional dragons is a very important part of your spiritual path – your spiritual journey […]

Enhancing Hope in Psychotherapy The enhancement of personal hope is a key part of successful psychotherapy practice. Some view this requirement as a foundational aspect of the therapeutic alliance; others do not hold the same view. In the case of serious co-occurring disorders, especially trauma and substance misuse, initiating, developing, and sustaining a hopeful future-view […]

Loss, Grief and Suffering in America By Anthony R. Quintiliani, Ph.D., LADC Other than our nation’s suffering during The Civil War, The Great Depression, and World War II this past year has been one of the most stress-filled, fear-filled times in our history. Here is a list of the reasons behind it all: the COVID-19 […]

Contemplative Practices – Affirmative Self-Inquiry Contemplation and affirmative self-inquiry may be helpful in improving your awareness of your better parts of self – your positive strengths and traits. Our self-critical mind often causes us to spend far too much time on critical, negative thinking about ourselves and about others. The practice below may be helpful […]

“i Rest” Yoga Nidra Practice (Richard Miller, Ph.D.) All regular meditation and yoga practices are capable of bringing us closer to our true self and our relationships in the world. A by-product is deep relaxation and equanimity. Richard Miller, Ph.D. (Clinical Psychologist, yogic scholar, spiritual teacher), has created a yoga nidra practice that promises to […]

“Ignorance” of Requirements Could End Your Clinical Career Recently various insurance, Medicaid, and Medicare fraud cases have been in the national headlines. Although these fraud cases grab headlines, the truth is that many clinically licensed helpers still do not understand clinical/legal documentation requirements. In Buddhism, “ignorance” gets in our way; we never approach true liberation […]

The True Nature of Phenomena Here I will present common steps in the process of vipassana meditation. My presentation will end with a brief discussion of nirvana (enlightenment). 1) It will be helpful not to have strong conceptual intention about your goal of attaining insight. You will know when you have entered it via your […]

Meditation at the Deepest Levels In 2007 M. A. Singer’s The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself, opened up a whole new, deeper perspective on why consciousness or pure awareness is the root of self. Even in a Buddhist “no-self” view, Singer’s inquiries leave us with a great deal to unravel. Here are some reasons why […]

Interoception and Your Inner Self-Helper Interoception (sometimes called neuroception) is a sensory experience, in which you feel sensations in your body (viscera, heart, throat, etc.) that may be warning signs of limbic surveillance or inner continuity of your inner self-helper – that part of you and your brain that hopes to help you in whatever […]

Supervision and Self-Care in Trauma Therapy Today there is an ever-increasing demand for effective trauma therapy. Our American clinical history on this matter leaves much to be desired. John N. Briere and Cheryl B. Lanktree offer important suggestions on how to use clinical supervision and self-care in your clinical work with clients suffering from serious […]

From The Eleanor R. Liebman Center for Secular Meditation We humans have a unique way of perceiving and processing emotional experiences. Years ago I developed a formula to understand the perception and process of emotional experiences: CABS-VAKGO-IS/Rels. The C stands for cognition; we spend a great deal of time thinking about pretty much everything we […]